"While most kids were learning multiplication, I was learning about the vig. My unofficial apprenticeship began at age six at my dad's side, who was allegedly helping a friend run a very successful 'sports analysis' firm. Fast forward, and that inside-track education has built a win percentage that makes sportsbooks nervous. Don't take my word for it—just ask Bovada, who officially branded me a 'professional.' It's their polite way of saying, 'Please stop taking our money.'"